OC RP Fiona and Ezra

 I feel like my life is like night and day. And a part of me knows, I'm the luckiest person in the world. The night of the flood, my dad showed up. Of course, I was so angry with him, and at the time, I was sick with worry about Matty. 

Damnit! Why can't I control my temper? Why can't I worry about the things I should worry about? Me.

Of course, Matty made it out all right. But I was furious with him. I would have punched him out if I could have, and I know that is crazy. Cause,  maybe I really am crazy. 

I know I'm not looking at the big picture.

I stayed with Dad for almost a week. 

See, I lost my job. Not everything on the Boardwalk made it. The ice cream shop closed due to all the water damage. So yeah, I feel so shattered. Add a few major panic attacks. All I know, I never want to go through this again. 

Dad found me a new therapist, and she doesn't even have the time to listen to everything. But I got new meds. Dad's helping. He knew somebody who knew somebody, and I got on at a new hotel where I work behind the desk. I have daytime hours. And I really don't have time for Matty to take up all my time. After all, I'm supposed to be working on a better me. 

And well, I'm glad I can move into the new place. Dad thinks it will be good for me. You know, be on my own. He wanted me to have a car, but I told him that was too much. The public transportation is fine. He's given me too much already. I'm just glad we can see each other, at least for Sunday dinner.

I'm numb at the moment. Not sure I can put into words how I really feel about this whole trailer park upheaval. I don't want to really feel anything. Because, well....I just don't understand. I mean, the trailer has been there forever and..and nothing ever happened. EVER.

Yeah, I'm pissed. Why? Why did it have to happen now? And the strange thing is, all that survived was some Taylor Swift T-shirt that I don't even know where it came from, and a Walkman that doesn't even work.

Honestly, I was living in someone else's museum, my grandmother's. And no one in the family would even take her stuff. I feel sad about that. I feel I have lost everything all over again. All of her photos. So many photos of a past I don't even know. I know I've let her down.

I couldn't help but have a breakdown. Of course, I'm not certain it was completely over Gram's things. I might be losing Dakota, too. Yeah, I know, I didn't really have her. And I'm not that kind of person, anyway. But now....

She talked a lot about Nav when we were at the shelter during the storm. Then she was like the president of his fan club or something. 

I know I have to keep going. Make the new place mine. But I'm so very tired. I just want to sleep. Yet, my bones feel restless. I'm not sure I'll ever be calm again. Because I feel I am letting go of the past every time I close my eyes. 

OC RP -Delia & Dakota

 

So, um I'm new. I know Ezra and now Han's. Actually, I just got on at the library. They can't seem to keep a clerk. Of course, the pay isn't great, but not bad. I think I can suffice. Maybe. 

I am trying to get an at-home job, but that is like a maze of tests, and I haven't heard anything definite.

Meanwhile, I already live in the apartment building where Han and Ezra are relocating. So I'm kind of excited, but you'd never know. I am very good at looking unhappy most times. I can't help it. It's just the way I am.

I know it's tough for those who have to relocate from the trailer park. I feel for them. The government shut-down isn't helping much either. We at least have a food drive going on at the apartment building for those in need. And of course, a food drive at the library for everyone else having these struggles. Let me tell you it is hard being a vegan these days. I've had to go vegetarian on occasion.  I blame it on Han. Why do I feel like eating when I'm around him? 

I can't say, it really feels like me at the new place. Maybe I was in a rush to get things for the apartment. It is much bigger than the trailer, especially the bathroom. And I did get a little help, like a new credit card. Still, I didn't want to go crazy and end up having to pay for all this for the next couple of years. So I tried to find things on sale or from cheaper outlets, like Urban Outfitters or Target. We will see if they last. I hope so.

I could have gotten a unicorn head to put on the wall, but I don't like seeing dead animal heads on the wall, even if it's an imaginary one. But I'm pleased with what I found.  I also did a little art therapy with Matty. So I  have at least one artwork to call my own. And I am trying to get to know him better.

Of course, there is so much I would love to buy, but I know less is more, and I have a bowl for soup and cereal along with cup. Still, I miss my electric kettle. I have to remember to get one. Why do I keep missing to find an essential I really need?

OC RP NAV

 Nav lost his glasses in the flood. All he has now are his sunshades. "I was the last to get out," he tells the reporter, after all, he was the handyman at the trailer park. 

After a quick inspection with the RED CROSS truck, he trudges in the mud, thinking of the Smiths' Every day is like Sunday. The song plays out in his head. He can't even will it to stop, even when he winces hard, staring, to focus in, on his muddy boots. He'd just gotten a new pair last week. So shiny and new, and now perhaps impaired as much as being without his wire rim glasses. Someone hands him a hot container of coffee. It is bitter and hot. He swallows, knowing to keep going, there must be caffeine. But his bones are tired from all the struggles of getting the old and the young to safety. It's so bleak to him, wondering where the homes are now. Washed out to sea, he guesses.

Perhaps a little shaky, he goes on with the interview. "I'm glad everyone got out." He says that someone named Matthew was a great help. He wonders now how Matty found such stamina. Maybe it was the rush of adrenaline, but he was right by Nav's side during the cold and wet disaster.

"So many of the old just wanted to stay put, like there was no hope. I know a lot of the trailers here hold so many memories. There were photos they must have cherished."

He listens to the question about the relocation at the old apartment building. "Well, of course, I'll go." He mentions he didn't have much to begin with. But he has no job, at the moment. His mother told him she'd help with his studies. "I won't be a handyman there. I plan to head back to med school." Although he feels troubled. It feels to him like a million years to accomplish his goal, but he promised his mother he would go back to India to be a doctor. Still, he feels he made the decision too quick. Especially when he sees Dakota in the crowd. She's brought him breakfast from McDonald's.

OC RP - Han

 FINALLY...I mean...finally things were coming together.  I found a place to live, even if no one was interested in really seeing it. And yeah (smiles impishly), a girl. 

It was like the stars were aligned or something (Scratches back of head in thought. His smile grows into a frown).

That was then. This is now. (Briefly, he lets a smile break on his thin face). I always wanted to say that, you know (he shrugs as if he knows he could play the lead in a drama and then sighs). I wasn't even here when it happened. I was with Delia drinking coffee. I know it's boring, but true. Well, we were sitting close together, all cozy, watching it rain. 

(He's quiet then, in thought. He looks down as if he's lost in thought. Finally, he looks up.) Not in a million years did I expect this. (His face is gloomy). All I  have is my phone now. No old school camera, really, such a great camera. I mean, it was old and all, but I loved that baby. I should have had it with me. (He sighs) I was just thinking about Delia, I guess. (He winces hard) I just think she's the only one who gets me. I mean, Ezra doesn't. I don't even know why we're friends. 

(He sighs, even-lipped and shakes his head no). I mean, he didn't even care to know if I was all right or not that time  I was trying to investigate Sam and that sister of theirs. I think they have super-powers or something, and he wouldn't even believe me. I bet they are assassins, at least hiding out here.

Anyway, I hope they are OK. I finally did hear from Ezra. (He puts his palm to his forehead as if to check if he has a fever).  I really don't want to lose our friendship with this whole upheaval thing. You know, moving to that old apartment building. He at least got me to meet Delia. Still, he never listens to me. He doesn't. (He sighs as if he isn't in the present, just his resentment of his friend Ezra).

I know he thinks I'm needy and all. Well, I'm going to show him, I don't need him. I don't. (He chuckles, then with a big smile) I've got Delia now.