The Black Hearts Club

 

OK, we were not going to be friends anymore. I mean, I was going off to the University, and well, Megan always had Craig. And what did she need me for? Sure, I was the one always there to listen. And believe me, Megan can be the drama queen.

You know, the slightest things. A pimple. Her dress turned pink in the wash. Her infamous hair. Driver's test. She had to have a special outfit for even that.

But she was always going places without me. And now, I'm going someplace without her. And she'd be fine. She'd be off at college too. That was the plan. Off to the Uni, but closer to home. Closer to Craig. Closer to...well, everything back home.

Honestly, I saw Megan doing everything without me. Really. That's just the way it is. She has everything figured out. Everything. I wonder what that feels like.

-Caitlin

Megan thought she might cry. Well, she knew it would be for all the wrong reasons. Naturally, it was all about her and not her friend Caitlin. She'd met her and her family down at the train station. Actually, Megan didn't even know where the train station was. She'd followed Caitlin's family down to where they'd see Caitlin off. She was going to the University. Already. School had been out just two weeks. This was Caitlin's way of getting ahead start, Megan supposed.

"Why on earth would you do it?" Megan was still in shock. She'd thought they'd have a summer of shopping and swimming together. At least. Now Megan would have to be on her own. There definitely would be no shopping thanks to her parents' divorce, and she was definitely not up for swimming.

"Because I want to." Plain and simple. Caitlin's way of getting her edge on anything. She was the type to go that extra mile. She was going to be a lawyer which meant loads of class work just to get into law school.

Well, here they were at the station. It was like Caitlin to take the train instead of the plane.

"When will you be back?" Megan wished she didn't care, but the fact was Craig had broken up with her. OK, she did first, but needed him back which had only lasted three days and one afternoon of breakup sex and now it was completely over, but she'd decided she might mention this to Caitlin later since this was her day. The big send-off. No need to give her bad news. Of course, the news was even worse.

Due to her parents' financial situation, Megan wasn't going to the nearby Uni as she'd expected. It was as if all bets were off. She was on her own now. Fortunate, to still be in the room she'd had since she was six. But she wasn't counting on that much longer, either. They were selling the house.

So when the tears dripped down her cheeks, Megan couldn't be sure if she was crying for herself or for Caitlin. Yes, for herself through and through, she knew she was selfish that way. But she kept hugging Caitlin.

"I'm going to miss you." Megan looked at her tiny friend. "You'll forget me. I know you will."

"I will not." Caitlin glared at her funny as if Megan had lost it.

"Just remember me, will you? You know, when you, are out having fun with all those new people you meet, you'll think of me."

"I'll e-mail you every day. We'll talk on the phone. Text. You know. Maybe I'll even try out Skype on my new laptop." Caitlin smiled as if Megan was making a big deal out of this for nothing.

"Of course, we will." Megan hoped. How long would that last? A Day. A week tops. Caitlin was moving on. She knew she had to let her go. But she never knew just how miserable she could feel until this moment when everything was actually gone that she'd taken for granted, all this time.

Caitlin thought she might throw up. The rush of excitement and dread hit her at once at the train station. It wasn't exactly a picture-perfect moment in an old movie. It was really kind of lame, she guessed. Her Mom took pictures with her old camera. She still wouldn't use the digital one. Finally, she got her brother to take a picture of her and Megan with her camera phone.

Caitlin sat there in her seat trying to get comfy as she stared at the tiny photo on her Virgin phone. Megan trying to look happy when Caitlin knew she wasn't. Now it brought Caitlin to tears. She wished she'd said the right thing. She was pretty sure she hadn't. It was depressing. She hadn't felt this awful in a long time.

It was Megan always getting ready for something. This ball. That banquet. She went places with Craig. They were such a couple. Caitlin was the third wheel.

She didn't even go to prom.

She hadn't been to a school dance since her Freshman year. She thought of how she'd dressed up in itchy ruffles with shoes that hurt her feet, and she could barely walk. A dress that suffocated her, just to show up at the Chinese place with a crowd of kids who couldn't remember her name. Megan had had two dates that night. Of course, she didn't know her very well then. Caitlin supposed she could have begged Megan for one of her dates. But she didn't, she knew who everyone wanted to be with, and it wasn't her. She felt as if she'd watched everyone jump into the pool of high school happiness, and she'd stood there on the edge with her arms crossed.

It was hard to believe they were still friends.

Now Caitlin felt so cold. It was May and she felt as if she'd be sick before she ever got to the Uni. Everything frightened her, suddenly. What was she doing? What if she lost her way and a serial killer found her and offed her the moment she lost her virginity.

Caitlin found herself digging in her bag for weapons then. She had an empty key chain. She'd even left her nail file at home. She had nothing but M&M's to munch on. She put one in her mouth then. Maybe she could blow one really hard out of her mouth if she had to..right in the neck.

_______________________________________

From my original Caitlin and Megan blog in 2010. After a very long lapse, I decided to put these characters to draft and create a new Caitlin and Megan. Of course, I don't write as much about those two either like I know I should.

-Ellie